It's 2012 already! The memory of the last day of school during last semester was still fresh. I planned a lot of things to be done during the year end holiday of 2011, but only 10% were carried out as planned. Anyway, the holiday was a plain torture for me. Until now, i'm still greatly affected by it. I decided to come back here as a blogger again so i have a place to vent, and to type out what i feel. Life has really been hard, and somehow i find it meaningless. And i'm losing myself. :(
It's meaningless cuz people run away from the problems instead of facing them with courage. If everytime when problems arise, and you just flee - seriously, life is meaningless. You gotta try! :( I tried my best to encourage you, to motivate you, to give you hope, to assure you... Cuz i hope you could give it another try. It's really wrong to give up now when you had already put in so much effort to make it happen. :( Don't run away.. it gets hard for me to cope it alone. I'm trying to fix it...
And sometimes i really lost balance 'cuz it's really hard to live strong myself, at the same time, encouraging others to live strong too. Sometimes, i feel like who am i to tell the others to be strong, to hold on tight to faith, to believe in His promises...when i am actually losing my strength, my faith, belief, and all?
It's meaningless cuz people run away from the problems instead of facing them with courage. If everytime when problems arise, and you just flee - seriously, life is meaningless. You gotta try! :( I tried my best to encourage you, to motivate you, to give you hope, to assure you... Cuz i hope you could give it another try. It's really wrong to give up now when you had already put in so much effort to make it happen. :( Don't run away.. it gets hard for me to cope it alone. I'm trying to fix it...
Struggling.
And sometimes i really lost balance 'cuz it's really hard to live strong myself, at the same time, encouraging others to live strong too. Sometimes, i feel like who am i to tell the others to be strong, to hold on tight to faith, to believe in His promises...when i am actually losing my strength, my faith, belief, and all?
It hurts to see someone being torn up emotionally. Sometimes you wanted to be there to help that person go through the hardship, but you yourself could hardly save yourself.
Anyway, i'm trying... :(
I'm trying to strengthen myself for those who need help... to be a help to others despite my own need for help. To be me-less so that it can be others-more. So, i just gotta pick my pieces up, strengthen myself, and continue to bless, inspire others and cheer others on in faith.
"imagine hurting someone, making them feel lonely, angry and unloved because you think it's the best for them."
This, is not the way... it will never be the best for anyone. So, please stop doing it. :(((I will not give up...
Even if it means ending up with wounds and scars all over.
Even if it means ending up with wounds and scars all over.
walau... my dear fren, why don't u directly tell him what u feel rather than u suffer alone?
ReplyDeleteyou re torturing urself...haiz
:) Don't worry... Everything is going to be fine.
ReplyDelete